Scent

by

Portia’s Theory of Fragrant Relativity

Hi there, ULG Perfume Buddies. I have a theory. Well, I’ve called it a theory, but that’s because I suffer delusions of grandeur. It’s just a thing that’s been rattling around in my brain for a while. It didn’t really have much fom till I mentioned it to some mates, and they all piled on with thoughts and japes. It was kind of out-of control. What came out of it was a crystallising of my thoughts, and then I thought it might be fun to discuss it with you all.

In 20-40 years time, the perfumistas will be reminiscing about their love for perfumes from Juicy Couture, Jessica Simpson, Agent Provocateur, Lady Gaga and Benefit.

They will dream of fruitchoulis, calone and rose/oud combos like we do about oak moss and musks.

The prices of these scents will skyrocket on the future equivalent of eBay, and we will finally get our long lost fougere, chypre and galbanum rich beauties for next to nothing.

Now, I also have a confession.

When I heard that Agent Provocateur had gone bust, I went straight to FragranceNet and bought two 100ml of three from their range. Maitress, Lace Noir and Blue Silk. Then I went searching high and low for their original Agent Provocateur EdP, found two bottles of that for quite good prices and am awaiting their arrival. Finally, I saw Fatale Intense in my local chemist and snaffled that too.

NOW I have to find somewhere to put the damn things…

Also, have you noticed Jessica Simpson frags getting harder to find? I might have panic bought some of them too.

 

 

The only bottles already in my collection were original Agent Provocateur EdP and Jessica Simpson Fancy Nights (not pictured). They have been long standing regular use perfumes in collection, and I’ll be sad to not have them. So, buying them makes sense, right? Backing up your disappearing beauties is a perfumistas stock in trade. Everything else, though, is a freaked out blind buy. There is no rhyme or reason to this. Suddenly the urge was upon me, the hunt was on, my cart full, checked out and sent. It’s like all my impulse control goes flying out the window.

Do you ever panic buy stuff just because it’s going, going, gone? What do you think of my Theory of Fragrant Relativity? What will you want to hoard?

Portia xx

 

Image: my own

by

You or Someone Like You by Etat Libre d’Orange – Portia

Hey Crew, You or Someone Like You is a fragrance but it’s also the title of a 2009 semi-autobiographical novel by Chandler Burr. The fragrance was created as a matching couplet and released 2017. As so many of the Etat Libre d’Orange oeuvre does, they take an old trope and freshen it up with a new twist, ingredient, direction or emphasis. As you all up there in the Northern Hemisphere are sweltering in the summer heat, I thought you might like refreshing spritz that is a bit more interesting and longer lived than a cologne. This fragrance has a wonderful lifespan story of phases.

You or Someone Like You by Etat Libre d’Orange

 

 

Fragrantica gives these featured accords:
Top: Mint, anise, bergamot, grapefruit
Heart: Cassis, green notes, hedione, rose
Base: White musk

Summer in Australia, especially as we were growing up, involved visits to the local National Parklands. Our local one was nearly 400 hectares of bushland with a river running through the middle. It had loads of grassy playing areas with little wood fired BarBQs and cement picnic tables & chairs around the outsides. We would go as a family, often with other families, and while most of the Dads would get the BarBQ going and most of the Mums would organise the tables, bread rolls, salads and condiments, the kids would be taken off for a bushwalk. It was hilly and rocky, and the cooling eucalyptus would shade and scent our walks. We would be shown native flora and fauna, given little info bites about everything and surviving in the bush. We would invariably end up at the weir where there was a large colony of ducks and geese. Everyone would get a couple of pieces of stale bread, and we’d feed them. Then we’d all head back and the meats would be sizzling on the BarBQ, all the adults would have had a couple of boozy bevies, and we kids would run off adventuring or playing cricket till it was time to eat.

You or Someone Like You is a perfect summer spritz with the cool green wash of eucalyptus from my childhood memory. Not noted but definitely smells like it should be. It smells like finding the shade after walking through the hot sunshine. Something else not noted in the list is salt water. I get loads of it as well. Not in a very aquatic style but hinting towards some of the L’Eau d’Issey Pour Homme line.

On opening, a sharply sweet citrus is enlivened by mint. It’s a beautifully mentholated coolness. The heart remains quite sharp green notes but feels like it’s been scoured clean by a cool sea breeze. There’s no hint of noxious seaweed under the pier. I also get no notion of the rose, and the white musk dry down still has green hints of mint and what I read as eucalyptus. So it never veers into that safe, bland, white musk laziness we smell so often after the initial fragrance fireworks have collapsed.

Totally unisex but veering towards mid 20th century traditional masculine, longevity is excellent, and projection is moderate.

Not the strangest of the Etat Libre d’Orange’s but also not a usual or expected scent.

Have you tried You or Someone Like You? Does it sound like you’d like it?
Portia xx

 

Image: my own

by

Portia Loves: Opium by YSL

Hi there crew!

Opium by YSL! It was a game changer. This was way back in 1977, but I’m pretty sure it didn’t hit Oz stores till later. It was only the lucky few international travellers or women whose husbands travelled for business that got their mits on a bottle. It caused a sensation. The name alone was scandalous and the strength! It could dry clean your curtains if you wore a couple of spritzes too much. I remember my Mum thinking it was a ridiculous concept, and she didn’t like the smell at all. Yes, I come from a long line of snarky, judgemental bitches. It’s hereditary, and we are kinda proud of it.

I, on the other hand, thought Opium perfectly marvellous. I’m about 10 years old by now and had very definite opinions of my own about everything. Already the world was seen through the black and white lenses of divine and vile, there was no meh. Even then I would make pronouncements instead of having a conversation, and once my mind was made up, it took a truckload of evidence to the contrary for me to even think about changing it. These were trying times for all around me, and me. My poor born and raised in God-fearing country-Australia parents were manifestly unprepared for such a child. It was like two sheaves of wheat had found themselves parents to a very camp, ridiculously beautiful, passionfruit vine. Let’s not get started on the wilfulness either shall we.

Anyway, Opium. So, fast forward a few years, and it’s the late 1990s. I’m finally introduced to my BFF Kath’s Mum. She ONLY wears Opium by YSL. We are not talking a shrinking violet in its usage either. This is an above 100ml per year wearer of Opium. At that stage, it was still in the pared down variation of the original spray bottle and smelled like a hairspray version of itself. Still recognisable after a while but cheaper smelling and shorter lasting. Then it all changed – the bottle, the scent, everything. Dad bought Mum a couple of bottles that she wore but didn’t really love.

Not sure exactly what year I decided to keep her in the original, but it was 10 or more years. Every time I’d see a vintage bottle at a fairly reasonable price (and that really ain’t cheap anymore), I’d grab it. I also grabbed all the summer flankers, extraits, men’s etc. I’m nothing if not dogged and obsessive.

Meanwhile Mum’s health started to deteriorate, and she slowly went from being all gussied up and out and about every day to an invalid. Still, she would spritz herself wet with Opium each and every day. The whole house smelled of it as you walked through the front door. Wonderful.

Anyway, two years ago Mum went on to the next grand adventure. We sprayed the chapel, her casket, the flowers and the house with so much Opium it was like a fog. It was a seriously wonderful service, and I was asked to do the eulogy.

Kath took what Mum had on her bureau to wear as memory scent.

I have had the same couple of bottles out on display for wear for ages (Opium Posie de Chine and Opium Secret de Parfum). Due to the C19 Lockdown though I’ve been going through my perfumes and assessing their merits. Especially my multiples. The vintage YSL box got a going over a couple of weeks ago. I was more than slightly surprised at how much Opium has been amassed. So, I decided to sell some off. Four bottles have gone on to fresher pastures, gave one bottle to Kath as an extra backup and a pair still in the sale list. I took 20% off what I paid for them, and they’d only been spritzed to authenticate, but they were still no bargain. Quite a few bottles got binned through the purchasing process because there is a lot of fake shit floating around.

So here is my pared down collection at this moment. Yes, I know it’s still a shitload of vintage Opium. Yes, I know I’ll never use it all up. Yes, I know hoarding is an illness. No, I’m not bothered by your judgement, actually I’m so used to being judged, it feels normal and right.

Ta Daaaaaa! Here lies my shame for all to see. Isn’t it marvellous? I will also admit to doubles of Opium Secret de Parfum, Opium Posie de Chine and an extra EdT that was a chemist tester that had lost its spritzer and cap.

 

Back: all BNIC: Opium Eau d’Ete, Opium Pour Homme Eau d’Orient, Opium Orchidee de Chine
Middle: Opium EdT, Opium Secret de Parfum, Opium Posie de Chine, Opium EdT, Opium Fleur de Shanghai
Front: Opium Sparkling EdT, Opium parfum, Opium EdT

I am wearing Opium Fleur de Shanghai at the time of writing. All the glamour of Opium in a summer weight and very slightly sweeter.

 

OK, so now it’s your turn to share a vintage story or a memory in the comments please.
Portia xx

by

Portia and LE LION de CHANEL

Hello Crew,

We’ve had some excitement around here in Australia. The news breaks that CHANEL is releasing a new Les Exclusif, and only the Middle East are getting it. Dubai! Not even Paris by all reports. Oh CHANEL, how well you know us. Suddenly LE LION de CHANEL is hyped beyond the stratosphere. It’s this, it’s that, just wait, you’ll die, it’s their best offering since Coromandel, when can we get it? It’s been a long time since a release garnered so much interest, excitement and speculation. I was agog with lemmings.

The fact that the world has been going through trauma, we’ve been locked down, life has become a very small circle, yet we are attached by the computer & TV to everything that’s happening worldwide 24/7. Watching POC around the world with their friends, families and supporters marching for an equality long denied. Trans people being told, again, that they are not their gender (that doctors and psychologist have agreed they are), and that they deserve to be placed in the “OTHER” category, preferable far far away. A pandemic that threatens lives and livelihoods that no one can seem to get a handle on and that has different symptoms and virility in every person it touches.

We needed a ray of sunshine. 99 years on from the launch of CHANEL No 5. The perfume world has been given something to write home about.

LE LION de CHANEL 2020 by Olivier Polge

Parfumo gives these featured accords:
Top: Lemon, Bergamot
Heart: Labdanum, Madagascan vanilla
Base: Sandalwood, Patchouli

Imagine the love child of CHANEL Coromandel, Guerlain Shalimar and DIOR Mitzah.

The first day I tried LE LION de CHANEL there were a group of about eight perfumistas having our first get together since C19 lockdown. We all had a spritz within about a minute. Every person got a different enough ride that they could have been different perfumes. On some it read crunchy toffee, others got animal resins, there was smoky incense, creamy sandalwood, citrus gelato, caramel. For everyone the timings were different, the depth, warmth, heft and also interestingly, WE ALL LOVED IT! Not one person in the room was less than spellbound.

My personal ride goes something like this. A swirl of pine lime gelato. Labdanum rich amber with a distinctly animalic bent. Creamy sandalwood tempered by a vanilla rich amber that has strong hints of the crackly toffee on the top of a creme brûlée. All day I was getting wafts of the most incredible resinously sweet fragrance out of the blue, and I’d think it was someone walking ahead, on the bus or train or in the department store. NOPE! It was me. The life of the fragrance is unbelievable. I’m still smelling a lived in vanilla and humanity over 24 hours later after running around town all day yesterday and then sleeping till 11 am.

How did I get it? One of my buddies owns a perfume chain here in Australia. His family owns department stores in Dubai, and they are selling LE LION de CHANEL. My buddy saw an opportunity and jumped on it. He brought in as much from Dubai as he could, which wasn’t very much. Last time we spoke he was waiting on a second order. I grabbed two 200ml bottles, and another buddy Matt and I hosted a split. We sold 150ml in 10ml batches at our cost price plus decant bottles and postage from each bottle and kept what was left for ourselves. The spots sold out in less than an evening. That’s why my picture is of a 3/4 empty bottle already.

Have you a lemming?
Portia xx

 

Image: My own